Sunday, November 15, 2009
Ya good call. That white guy fro could go either way. E.g. cool i like the modern rock and\or roll music on the one hand, "look at me it's zany eric with all the seinfeld quotes" on the other.
Sunday, November 1, 2009
Also this picture is funny: "no credit cards, only cash" it's like the perfect metaphor for Bobby, I bet.
Thursday, October 22, 2009
Wait so is he the dude who sells eating mushrooms to the bourgeoisie? Or is he the guy who skulks around whispering "hashish, marijuana, shrooms" to all the people who look like people of ill repute* coughmecough. He looks like he could go either way.
*does this mean prostitute? I hope not. I just meant people with a general air of mank.
Sunday, October 18, 2009
Submitted by Emily: This boy is my highschool crush. The first one was taken his last year of highschool (2 or 3 years ago) and the second one is more recent. Notice the great additions in the second picture? The subtle beard scruff, and cute toque. To die for.(....I have him on facebook, haha). To this day I have not gotten over this crush, and would give anything for an exuse to talk to him, and for him to have to reply, hahaha.
I don't know...I think he looks better without the beard. I don't like the shape of that beard it's too, on his neck. My friend met this guy the other night who had had all his facial hair laser removed to keep a look of eternal youth, he was gay obviously and apparently a little crazy but...maybe this could be a new trend for straights with extra disposable income?
I was talking with this same friend and we were comparing style of different cities and countries. He was all bla bla bla NY is the best because he had lived in NY. And then I was like, people in Toronto have kind of good style sometimes? And he was like "all the have is toques. That's their style. Toques*." Ya. touche I guess.
Anyways. So from what I gather Emily wants this guy to know that she submitted him so that they can finally have their long lost love? So I'm going to put an Oprah-like pedophile watch out to all you people except instead of looking for a pedophile so we can arrest him, we are looking for this guy somewhere in Canada (Toronto?) and telling him he's on this website so we can looove connection him. Got that? Everyone look outside your windooows....Now!
*ps american: toque means hats like that. i think you call them beanies or something else equally puh-thetic?
Thursday, October 15, 2009
I'm sold. Totally babe. Though in this picture, if he wasn't wearing his plaid shirt and leather jacket he could be mistaken for an entirely different character a la Gummo.
Sidenote: Americans! What's wrong with you?!?!?!?!? Why don't you tell me where you're from? That's what Americans do. If you ask an American abroad where they're from they won't say "America" like the humble Pakistanis and Canadians. No they'll say Huntingon, or Hoosierville, or whatever other fucking place they come from and assume you know where that is. That's the spirit of America we're all looking for.
Update: Brandon (next post) is from Nashville
Monday, October 12, 2009
Submitted by Amanda: "Hi. I am submitting a picture (actually two) of a cute boy. I have to admit that he is my husband. Is that breaking a rule of some sort? I am sure it is, I should have just lied. I couldn't decide which one of these pictures is better, so I thought I'd leave it up to your editorial expertise. In the second one, he is standing in our motley backyard drinking a cup of coffee, and in the first he's in our shitty hotel room bathroom in Vegas after 3 days of camping. For some reason his nose looks a little bigger in that picture than normal.
Anyway, his name is Brandon, he enjoys nachos, taking pictures, voting for Ralph Nader and being cheap. "
Thursday, October 8, 2009
Saturday, October 3, 2009
I have a ton of your cutes in my inbox I will post them soon once I get up and at them and have a home, etc.
In the mean time please be inspired by these dancing waving rockstars and "party on" "dudes".
Friday, September 25, 2009
Pictures like this remind me that I am bound for a life of mediocrity because I can't enjoy things that are too good. Like sometimes I can't watch 30 Rock because I get too jealous of Tina Fey for being funnier than me. Or I can't go to concerts that are too awesome because I get sad that I am not in the band and that I do not, in fact, "rock". In the end, I just end up watching real housewives of NJ so I can feel good about myself.
Similarly, looking at this picture just makes me sad. When I got it I felt a distinct sinking in my heart and then I went and made a sandwich (it was lunch time and I was planning on making a sandwich anyways...but still).
Wednesday, September 23, 2009
As someone who has never been to L.A. this seems like the quintessential L.A. person to me. It's not his long curly blond hair, or his surfer tan or the fact that he makes American Apparel look like "club wear" instead of house party or barfing in the bushes wear. It's more this L.A. androgynous thing he has going...which is not like NY androgynous where people look like sexless rectangular robot aliens...L.A. androgynous is like a drawing by a little kid learning to draw who doesn't realize that you only put those six lines for eyelashes on the girl drawings and that the boys get two circles and three line bicycles instead. But I guess that "poorly drawn" quality is an L.A. trademark (see: boobs, noses, brow lines)
p.s. "gorgeous and awesome girlfriend" booooring. Although I like it in the context of having made out with him...it really is like The Hills over there!!!!!!! Jealous.
Monday, September 21, 2009
I had the honour of exhibiting with Jurgen Ostarhild this week, and he sent me in this picture to prove that he was once a cute boy himself. Thanks to all of you who flew in from your respective countries to see the show. As I was not there for most of it I will only assume that this is what you did. Also that you are invisible elves and that's why no one saw you as the gallery was slowly but surely inundated with crickets.
While we were setting up Jurgen fell from a ladder and hit his head on the wall. There were a few terrifying seconds where he lay motionless on the ground and we all thought that maybe he was dead or broken. But then, he rose again, like an eccentric silver-haired german phoenix from the ashes, that or Jesus.
Wednesday, September 16, 2009
Time:12:00PM Friday, September 18th
As part of the Paris-wide beauty event, les Rives de la Beauté, Door Studios is opening its doors to a selection of exhibitions and workshops to examine the link between beauty and image.
-Photo projections by Jurgen Ostarhild and Marie Richer
Rives de la Beaute
Monday, September 14, 2009
Saturday, September 12, 2009
Thursday, September 10, 2009
I don't think we have to state the obvious with this picture. The obvious not stated being that this guy looks mentally retarded. We'll have to trust anon that he's beautiful because it's impossible to tell. But what's more beautiful than a guy with a sense of humour, a sense of humour that includes imitating retarded people?
Monday, September 7, 2009
The photos actually tell a story:
-First it is raining and the rabbit is really sad about his leather bag getting wet (the one he acquired in a David and Goliath battle against a cow which he won by hopping on its head until it went cuuhrazy and then rolling it up in a carpet and throwing it off a bridge).
-Then the rabbit gets attacked by flying pieces of wood (the spirits of the cow's clam friends from under the sea, avenging his death).
-He escapes [not pictured...escape too sneaky to capture].
-Then it stops raining but he still sits there looking sad with his umbrella inside-out cause someone thought it would be cute to lift him up by the ears without realizing that doing that makes bunnies go retarded.
Fabien will be releasing his vinyl ep in October, featuring blablabla ba bla + me in the choir + the other people in the choir (which includes me). I'm about 95% sure that the only reason I was included in the choir was so I would publicize it free...but you know what? I'm ok with that. How else will I share my voice drownded (sic) out by many other voices with the world? Ein? You tell me.
If you are in Paris-town the release will be September 21st in the evening time at Les Disquaires in the 11th. Though since most of you are in oonst-versbalkat and poland-land and iraq-land and united land of american states, you will only be able to attend in spirit :( but also :) (yay spirit! not just for cheerleaders anymore!)
Friday, September 4, 2009
Let me say that, strictly speaking, I don't consider male models "cute". But that being said, I won't kick them out of bed...blog = metaphorical bed.
Also, I'm feeling pretty happy about the fact that Soulja Boy is the ESL teacher for this new generation of male models. Now I can feel safe knowing that when I ask my international lovers to "supah man dat ho" (while referring to my self in the third person) and they will know what I'm talkin' 'bout.
Wednesday, September 2, 2009
Speaking of how I now refer to my youth in the past tense, this l'il guy seemed scared of me. Not in the OMG you're so babe way, but in the agh you're an old monster trying to steal my youth via your olde tyme magical picture box way.
Tuesday, September 1, 2009
The first boy I fell upon was this intimidating looking character. However, after attempting to act aloof for exactly 3 seconds Fabien turned into a loveable chatterbox who launched into a monologue that went a little like "You're really cool eh? and brave! Cool and brave. Do you think people in Paris are jerks? They probably don't even get you right? They probably don't even understand that you're like this totally cool girl because they're so not cool here." OMG that's so true! All of that. I am so cool and brave and the best!!!!! I forgot for always somehow.
Fabien is a musician\fashioney person, but I think that his real calling is building a Tony Robbins-style empire. One that would encourage all the nerdy white girls into believing that they really are as great as their moms say they are.
Monday, August 31, 2009
Saturday, August 29, 2009
Have you ever been to one of those international cultures of the world shows where you are promised lots of delicious free samples but instead what you get is the most attractive representative each country could find doing something innoffensively "cultural" e.g. dancing a dance and handing out hard candy (India) or wearing a tasteful black scarf and then cutting off your hand if you try to take a free sample (Saudi Arabia)?
Well, this is Hawaii's pick for next year's show. He will be spear fishing out of a kiddie pool then handing out shell necklaces to all the pretty ladies of the world...if they promise to visit...BEAUTIFUL HAWAII...wink.
*Thanks a lot "Paige" or should I say "Hawaiian ministry of tourism"?Puh.
Friday, August 28, 2009
Wednesday, August 26, 2009
It is hard to not fall into being a jerkstore, because my first reaction to almost all the pictures are to make fun of them in my head. Maybe it comes from years of training (at least 2yrs) looking at Facebook profiles in my underpants and yelling "puthetic!" at the computer screen, while eating fishsticks and smoking scavenged cigarettes my roomate has foolishly failed to smoke down to the bottom.
I am just going to say one mean thing about this guy though. He looks like he learned what a cool outfit looks like via a text-only document, and then proceeded to buy the absolute worst version of each thing listed. There I said it. But I like skinnies. And boy is he skinny!!!!!
Monday, August 24, 2009
Saturday, August 22, 2009
The worst thing an american-asian has ever done to me is crowd me on the sidewalk for no reason. Or else counterfeit Canadian money in his dorm room bathtub. Or else run a massive pot-growing operation from his parents' suburban home with positive final outcomes for everybody. ;)
But if we ignore the wholesome happy smiles and the sassy pout the guy in the back is giving,...these L.A. asians look like real gangstaz! Maybe they really do exist! Like Tinkerbell or some drug that if you eat it you get skinny but still get to keep your teeth (sigh, if only)
Are all your asians like this L.A.? Is that why you are city of midwestern dreams?
Thursday, August 20, 2009
What do you mean shoddy? Like his joints don't bend properly? And if so...when you say he so isn't...does this mean you have evidence that his joints do in fact move with average to above average fluidity and speed? Because that's really important in a relationship*.
*This sentence meant to be absurd not sexual
Monday, August 17, 2009
Fred: Oui oui pas de soucis Mary ;) [not my name but whatever]
CBMMN: What companies have you modeled for?
CBMMN: How does it feel to be a FAMOUS MALE MODEL?
CBMMN: Do you have ONE MILLION GIRLFRIENDS?
CBMMN: Ya fun an thank you. As for you being too much atypical, I'm sure the teens of the world will disagree.
Saturday, August 15, 2009
At the time I thought it was a ploy which was intended to make me "get Jesusy with it" (like the hit song by top recording artist Will Smith). But in retrospect I should have listened to the wisdom that only someone famous in an unrelated field to the one they are talking about can have. Because now all I want is a nice gay boyfriend who will never want to have sex (with me), ever.
Friday, August 14, 2009
Tuesday, August 11, 2009
Upon third reflection I realized that I can't really tell what James looks like from this picture because of the face covering pose. He could either be a cauliflower eared James Franco or a weird crooked face. Ultimately, I feel confused and need a nap now.
P.S. I hope this isn't a sneaky trick to get linked and Cauliflower Ears is just the name of a band that made its own Wikipedia page. Too lazy to check though.
Update: I read the Wikipedia page. Cauliflower ears = Probably the reason for that hoodie...sowwy :(
Sunday, August 9, 2009
I wish boys liked girls who worked at some vaguely left wing job as much as girls like boys who do. Life would be so much more of a relax where you had tons of spare time to cuddle furry lil animals and practice your picture face
Thursday, August 6, 2009
Monday, August 3, 2009
Saturday, August 1, 2009
I can't believe I forgot to post this picture!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Awkward straight cops feeling scared are one of the highlights of Pride!!!!!!!!!!!
Thursday, July 30, 2009
I feel like I am attracted to these people only on some theoretical, cultural vacuum level. But that in real life I would hate them in the personality. Especially if they spoke English, then I would probably hate crime them (e.g. toilet paper their cars (with 1-ply (because I'm poor but still like to have a good time))).
Plus you just know they hang out with Berlusconi at his sexy statuatory rape parties.
Tuesday, July 28, 2009
Ya he looks cute. Reminds me of those days where all you wanted was the guy who worked at the vegan food shoppe\luxury cheese store because you knew he was probably smart about things that were important but boring for you, like philosophy and\or veganism.
But how much can we really trust this picture? Vegans are tricky! Always tricking us with their meat flavoured patties and buttery spreads! And here he is clearly tricking us by using these other "urban grocers" to make himself look relatively more attractive.
Sunday, July 26, 2009
Man being a model for American Apparel is the new being chosen to dance on American bandstand.
It's really nice how he agreed to take a picture with that withered ghoul...I hope he was nice about it and not just doing it so that he could have an ironic Facebook picture later and change his status to "looves withered ghouls...not! High five! \ (thumbs up emoticon)"
p.s. is this guy gay or is he gay?
Thursday, July 23, 2009
Oh man I totally know that awkward "okkaaaay". It comes from them feeling scared that their carefully created hairstyles and cool, fry-eating facades are going to erode as soon as they have to talk. And from loving you, probably.
And what about middle teen? You don't want to marry him? You could eat french fries in bed and drink coca cola all day long, and when you get accidentally teen pregnant by skinny dipping in the same swimming pool (it can happen!) and become a teen mom you can gel your baby's hair into new and even zanier hairstyles!
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Wednesday, July 22, 2009
That's weird, I don't see a woman in this picture. All I see is a totally modern experimental music box which means that I probably like this band now.
Monday, July 20, 2009
OMG I love this picture sooooooooo much it brings a tear to my eye. And it's not because I just drank half a bottle of wine by myself while listening to "the greatest love of all" on replay. You know why it is the tearing of eye? Cause it keeps it real!!!! Look at how real everyone is keeping it! I couldn't even draw dragons on their faces!
You know what is not keeping it real, friends?
1-Sending pictures of really young t(w)eens and then saying they are 20. When you're an old like me you can tell the difference.
2-Sending pictures of yourself semi-nude and writing messages like "lol this is this cyut guy everyone loves him at the high school". When you're an old (in internet years) this also is an obvious lie
3-Sending pictures of your boyfriend's band who has less than 100 listens on Myspace and writing "omg this is a so good band that everyone is loving it to the max!" a) no they're not b)my blog won't make them famous. Srsly. Totem pole---->bottom.