Tuesday, April 6, 2010

Will, Utah (one can only assume)

" This is Will. I knew him when he lived in my hometown for a little bit. Good looks and he is a wholesome Mormon boy as well"

I have quite a few comments about this one. First of all, boys think that they can trick people with flattering camera posing because they don't know the hours, nay, the years that women and gays spend in front of the mirror practicing that shit not just for photo use but for all the time. Maybe I'm cray cray but does anyone else out there constantly hold their face in a concious pose? In public mine is usually of adorable confusion and surprise. Anyways, dude is sucking in his cheeks and pursing his lips.

Second, I have finally switched to actual photoshop instead of ye olde photoshoppe aka MS Paint. And although it's still obvious, it's less obvious, and I have to tell you that I gave this guy a much needed haircut of a lifetime. It definitely had "wholesome mormon boy" written all over it before.

Lastly, let's get serious folks. I really don't want to be mean. I want to be all about love and appreciation for the less attractive sex and give props to all you teens and twentyteens. But am I really sending the message that "A Wholesome Mormon Boy" would be something I wouldn't reflexively hate on? Mormons spend a third of their salary on the church! That is the mink coat and grillz money!!!! If God didn't want minks and grillz he wouldn't have invented them and given them such a glamourous sheen!!!

Also, I don't remember where I heard this, but I heard that Utah is completely surrounded by a deep gulch that is full of snakes. I know that sounds like a lie from the liberal media but I trust in that very same liberal media!!!!! Can someone back me up on this?

Mormon side hugs for all!!!!

22 comments:

Sarah said...

One problem, you have deformed his head a bit and it's a little scary!

Drunken Lemurs said...

oh how i love that one-handed-shoulder-pat hug.

confessions of a marc addict. said...

i live in utah, and trust me...not everyone that lives here is like this guy or like the stereotypical psychotic religious fanatics that most people think we are. i'm not mormon, and i have no religious affiliation. most of the people in my life don't either. mormons barely even make up the majority anymore, and if the trend continues, they soon won't have the majority at all. that being said, i definitely get a good laugh out of any religious fanatic too, no matter what religion they choose to go crazy on.

Shannon said...

He's cute. Don't edit the photos. I'm sure he was even cuter before.

cuteboysmakemenervous said...

look i know i gave him a lopsided head but he had the most terrible spikey gel curl thing before. don't make me show you!!! don't make me!!!!

Portia said...

SHOW ME!!!!!!

Jonathan said...

show-ME!!!!!!!!

MARTTA said...

adorable confusion and surprise - yeah, sounds familiar.

Rene said...

I want to see the original photo! Spikey gel curl thing and all!

Margox said...

I wanna see the original photo too! Show us, show us!

Anonymous said...

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Anonymous said...

To be more accurate on something you said. I am LDS aka "mormom" and we don't give one third of our income to the church. we are asked the same of most other christian churches... 10 percent. one tenth. or whatever you want to call it. It is a commandment that come from the bible. A site that is awesome for getting the real facts is http://www.lds.org

rachelrose said...

oh, dear, a wholesome mormon boy. i'm always getting hit on by them because i look young/innocent/impressionable/apparently mormon. it's my personal cross to bear. but give me not your sympathy! i shall rise above this trial a new, stronger woman.

yours, rachel rose.

http://thereisnoreasonwhy.blogspot.com/

x said...

yeah, "not to hate" or whatever you said.. you were definetly hating and your totally ignorant.

Anonymous said...

it's "you're" puh.

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Los Angeles SEO said...

He really has kind eyes.

Air Purifiers said...

Mormon boys are dangerous! Cause they're sweet and adorable and gentlemanly and sexually repressed... but on the flip side they don't drink caffeine, don't drink booze, don't do drugs, don't have sex before marriage (well they're not supposed to do any of these things), so if you're not planning on converting anytime soon stay away! I dated one and crushed on one for a long time, they're both married and living in Utah with what I assume are 20 kids each. (So having sex but no drugs or booze still).

Sofa Burbank said...

Is it the camera angel or is his head miss shaped?

laser hair removal san francisco said...

Mormon boys are always cute, nice, and want to convert you!

roof hatches said...

Will is cute, and he looks like he knows it!

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